Sometimes I have to remind myself that my feelings are okay. That it is okay to feel angry, upset, grief, happiness, and everything all in once.
Just because he is dead, does not mean it is wrong for me to speak ill of him.
Just because he is dead, does not mean that I have to pretend that everything was peachy keen when he was alive.
Because that’s not the truth. It’s dangerous to have that mindset.
Now that he’s dead, I’m free.
It’s okay on this father’s day if you hate your dad. If you love him. Or fuck, even both.
It’s okay if you don’t want to call him.
It’s okay if you don’t want to send a card or get him a present.
It’s okay if you long more than anything to be a father but you cannot or are not for whatever reason.
Your feelings are still valid.
Your feelings are yours and yours alone.
Don’t let anyone tell you that they’r not okay or you have to do this or that or you’re a “bad daughter” or “bad son” or “bad child”. You aren’t.
And that’s okay.