“I walked away understanding I have a rare form of whatever the hell it is and without treatment my chances sucked, but with it they still sucked and somehow I knew my choice wasn’t about living but about living well. I wouldn’t recommend this to anyone else but I’m not going out bald and puking. I don’t have anything to teach anyone about life, and I’m not brave, but I’d rather be a flash than a slowly cooling ember. I’ll eat healthy food, gobble supplements, and take whatever the universe gives me.” – Ben Wolf in Deadline
I want to be a flash. I’m not brave. I’m not smart. I don’t have anything to offer. But unless I live boldly, I don’t want to live at all.
I will not go quietly.
Until I’m on my death bed, I will speak out.
I will speak out of injustice. I will pray for the refugee crisis. I will reach out to those in need. I will fight for equality.
I will not stand silently as I watch people suffer.
I will not be silenced about the issues I’m passionate about – autism acceptance (NOT. AWARENESS. AWARENESS SUCKS), disability equality and rights, rights for people who don’t fit the cookie cutter gender molds, and recovery from abuse.
I will not go gently in that good night. No one will ever say I was known for being quiet. I will be fiercely stubborn, incredibly loyal, and overly passionate.
If the day comes where I have to choose between a crapshoot drug that makes me ill and unable to enjoy life or enjoy life but live a shorter live, I will choose the second.
I will have a life well lived.
No one will ever look back and call me a coward.
No one will ever look back and say I didn’t fight with all my might.
No one will ever think I wasn’t passionate.
I don’t want people to remember me as the sick girl.
Instead, I want to be remembered as the compassionate, loyal, stubborn, and sometimes hilarious friend who stood for what she loved.