she wishes God would give her some answers and make her feel beautiful

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I had back surgery on May 9, 2011. This is what my back looked like before I went into surgery. It was bad. I believe the curve was between 38-40 degrees. The black spot is called a dural ectasia and only occurs in EDS, NF1, and Marfan Syndrome (along with a coupe other rare disorders). There are small fractures in the bones, but you really can’tsee them. what you also cannot see is the way my vertebrae are deterrating. They were also scalloping, which no, does not mean there were fish in my back. My back was in really, really bad shape. The surgery was scheduled for May 9, 2011. Getting everything set up was a nightmare. One professor didn’t want to move the final, but she did and I got a B. I got a C+ in another class. I don’t know about the third yet. Anywa,y yeah, that’ my back before. Before going under was terrifying. They let Rollie,a church pastor come back, along with Susan and Adelaide (who happens to be my favorite three year old girl ever). They talked to me and calmed me down, and I was in good spirits. The hospital also gave me a sweet gown that allowed me to control the tempeature of the gown. Sweet. A heated gown.

Not long after talking to them, th
ey put IDs on Norabear and Zoephent back to the OR with me. They gave me Versed and the last thing I remember is hearing Adelaide giggle. I woke up after the producure with something draining shit from my back, and a cath draining my bladder (
when they took that out a few days later, best feeling ever!). They had my warm, fuzzy blanked that my friend Kim and her daughter Naomi made for me over me, and had nestled Norabear (which kim’s daughter Dolly and Millie made) in my arms. My first words were “Where’s Susan?”
Now, I bet you’re wondering what my back looks like.
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It looks like this. There are no screws or hooks in the middle because the vertebre were too thin. I was on high pain meds for a few days, and I’m still on a good dose of them. This is the scar. I’m linking to it because some of you may not want to see it.
I still can’t do many things, like I can’t do my own hair, and I sometimes have torublewith my t-shirts. Walking is uardl but a special friend ordered me a new pair of light weight crutches that I get on Monday.
Six days post op, they took the dressing off, gave me a shower, and allowed me to wear real clothes. I’m told I look pretty good for six days post op:
One of the nurses helped me get dressed, and did my hair for me. And let me tell you, it felt GERAT to be dressed in semi-normal clothes. Friends visited, and they were way too kind to me.
I was released to a nursing home/rehab center on Tuesday. I’m the youngest here by like five decades. They do lots of therapy here to get me back to normal. I’ll need a PCA and likely a home health nurse. I’ll have friends helping me cook and I’ll be in a studio, so if anyone needs to they can stay the night.
For the first time since surgery, I wore jeans today. Since I got taller from surgery.I am no longer tripping over them . Susan helped with my hair and for about 12 days post op I look pretty kick ass:
So that’s it. I move to Concordia on Monday, with the help of some friends. I’ll get all settled into my apartment, and life will be groovy. Really can’t wait to be in my own place! I do need to get a TV off Craigslist or Freecycle so I can hook up my N64 and get a cheap DVD player so if anyone in the area can keep their eyes open on Freecycle and Craigslist that would be great and i’ll happily reimburse you.
All that to say, I’m doing better than the doctors expected. I’m still living in pain, but it’s getting better. They’re trying to control it with the meds the best they can. Which is all I can ask. Hopefully this surgery will change my life, and be the upswing to my health getting better
Peace out!

8 thoughts on “she wishes God would give her some answers and make her feel beautiful

  1. Oh man, I wish you were closer, I would give you the tv that has been sitting around here for a year. You are looking great! I hope you have an easy recovery ahead.

  2. CJ, kindly do one of two things:

    A) Fuck off and die in a fire
    B) Leave. Her. Alone. you creepy-ass motherfucker.

    Or both, I leave it up to her.

  3. CJ, leave her alone. I would be all non-Christian and tell you to fuck off, but that wouldn't be very nice, now, would it?

  4. CJ; please leave me alone. I have asked you to keep you distance from me and that at time point in time, I have no interest in any sort of relationship. I blocked you from following this, and I don't appericate you using other means to get to my blog. You were blocked from following for a reason – and that generally means that your comments are not welcome. Please quit reading my blog, and please no longer comment on it. I have set distance and boundaries for a reason. Respect them.

  5. Guys, CJ has been blocked from viewing this now. I'm leaving the comments for 'proof' so they canno b delated, but the prupiseof this post is not to flip out at Cj.

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